On the Power of Friendships

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Why do we assume romantic relationships are more important than friendships? What do we lose when we expect a spouse to meet all our needs? And what can we learn about commitment, love, and family from people who put deep friendship at the center of their lives?

Join NPR journalist Rhaina Cohen for an illuminating conversation on the power of platonic partnerships and how the thrill, intimacy, and commitment we seek is often found through meaningful friendship. Sharing insights from her years of original reporting and social science research, Rhaina argues that we undermine romantic relationships by expecting too much of them and diminish friendships by expecting too little of them.

Rhaina discusses her most recent book, The Other Significant Others, which invites us into the lives of people—spanning age and religion, gender, sexuality, and more—who have defied convention by choosing a friend as a life partner. Their riveting stories unsettle widespread assumptions about relationships and reveal how freeing and challenging it can be to embrace a relationship model that society doesn't recognize. And they show that orienting your world around friends isn't limited to daydreams and episodes of The Golden Girls, but possible in real life.

At a time when many Americans are spending large stretches of their lives single, widowed, divorced, or feeling the effects of the "loneliness epidemic," Rhaina challenges us to ask what we want from our relationships—not just what we’re supposed to want—and helps us to examine how we define a fulfilling life.
 

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Rhaina Cohen is a journalist based in Washington D.C. who specializes in longform journalism that’s both narrative-driven and ideas-rich. She’s the author of the bestselling book The Other Significant Others and a producer and editor for NPR’s Embedded.

Rhaina is a social science nerd at heart, and for about four years, has covered the social sciences as a producer for the podcast and radio show Hidden Brain. She produced, edited, and reported stories for shows across NPR, including Invisibilia, Morning Edition, All Things Considered, Life Kit, Planet Money, Up First Sunday, and Louder Than A Riot. Outside of NPR, Rhaina has written for various publications, including The New York Times, The Atlantic, The Washington Post, and The New Republic. Her Atlantic article, “What If Friendship, Not Marriage, was at the Center of Life?” was named a “Best of 2020” article by Longreads and Pocket and Anne Helen Petersen says reading it is “a must.” In a past life, she worked for ABC News' This Week with George Stephanopoulos and as a research assistant for books about single women, Michelle Obama, and older women.

Rhaina has a B.A. in American Studies from Northwestern University and an MPhil in Comparative Social Policy from Oxford, where she was a Marshall Scholar and did research in Denmark and Iceland on paternity leave policies. Her work has been supported by fellowships from the National Endowment for the Humanities, FASPE, Monson Arts, and Jentel Arts. She has given talks at NASA and at universities in the U.S., U.K., and Ireland. She thinks the most intriguing information often lies in the footnotes and is an evangelist for the humble voice memo.
 

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